Does anyone know how to get in touch with Kristen, the prostitute involved with the naughty governor of New York? Because I have a few questions. Well, really just one: What exactly to do you do for $1,000 an hour? Because I'm thinking . . . If I could do whatever that is, it might help encourage Husband to get some things done around the house. I mean, he wouldn't have to pay me $1,000 or anything, just install my front door, remove the tarps covering half the front of our house, repair our front fence. . . . You get the picture. Oh, wait. You think the fact that I most likely do not bear any physical resemblance to Kristen might present a hitch in this plan? OK, fine. Just the front door.
And about the naughty governor . . . I think having this picture published has got to be part of the punishment.
That's got to hurt. As it should.