I've been distracted, anxious, unsettled. And on the eve of an election that, if the polls are to be believed, is going my way. What's up with that?
I had to bake my way through three pies (two pumpkin, one Dutch apple and quince) to see my way clear. Here's my problem.
Yes, it's a cartoon. Yes, it's Homer Simpson. But my mind is back in 2000. The night of that election, I went to bed with Al Gore as my next president. The next morning I woke to news that not only was this possibly not the case but that something even worse was taking place: When there were questions about the accuracy of vote recording, the Republicans did not want votes recounted. If you're confident you've won an election fair and square, why wouldn't you? And anyway, isn't this a democracy? Isn't counting votes what we do? I think it was one of the saddest days ever for Americans.
As so while I'm reasonably confident that the election will go the way I see as positive progress (Obama, Dems. in control, no on Calif. propositions 4 and 8), my trust in the American democratic process was broken in 2000 and has yet to recover.
Tomorrow night I will hunker down with the people I love the most—kids and all—to wait it out. I think we'll be happy with the results, but for me it will be tempered with sadness by the doubt I have and by the knowledge that regardless of who wins, a good many people (many of them good people) will be unhappy, angry, and scared. That's how divided and broken these past eight years have left us. I can only hope that on the morning after, we can move on together.