Monday, November 3, 2008

What's wrong with me

I've been distracted, anxious, unsettled. And on the eve of an election that, if the polls are to be believed, is going my way. What's up with that?

I had to bake my way through three pies (two pumpkin, one Dutch apple and quince) to see my way clear. Here's my problem.



Yes, it's a cartoon. Yes, it's Homer Simpson. But my mind is back in 2000. The night of that election, I went to bed with Al Gore as my next president. The next morning I woke to news that not only was this possibly not the case but that something even worse was taking place: When there were questions about the accuracy of vote recording, the Republicans did not want votes recounted. If you're confident you've won an election fair and square, why wouldn't you? And anyway, isn't this a democracy? Isn't counting votes what we do? I think it was one of the saddest days ever for Americans.

As so while I'm reasonably confident that the election will go the way I see as positive progress (Obama, Dems. in control, no on Calif. propositions 4 and 8), my trust in the American democratic process was broken in 2000 and has yet to recover.

Tomorrow night I will hunker down with the people I love the most—kids and all—to wait it out. I think we'll be happy with the results, but for me it will be tempered with sadness by the doubt I have and by the knowledge that regardless of who wins, a good many people (many of them good people) will be unhappy, angry, and scared. That's how divided and broken these past eight years have left us. I can only hope that on the morning after, we can move on together.

17 comments:

Deb said...

Cindy,

I feel the same way!! While I want Obama to be president, and for that ridiculous prop 8 to be vetoed, I do realize that not everyone shares my opinion, and I hate that tomorrow there will be so much division.

You are right, hopefully we can move on together (with Obama as president). Just had to insert that last comment. :)

Jackie said...

I didn't sleep at all last night.

KatieGirlBlue said...

My god, it's like The Treehouse of Horror episode in November!

adozeneggs said...

I share your fears.

Belle in Bloom said...

I completely understand. However, amongst the plentiful republican voters in our blog community, I've heard a lot of women say although they back their republican choice, if it goes the other way, they will be respectful and look forward. Hopefully, this will be the case. I don't trust the "polls", though. Like you, I was shocked and totally confused with the Al Gore outcome in 2000. It could happen again. At our house, we're praying, voting and praying some more. Good luck today fellow democrat.
Love,
Belle

More, More, More said...

at least baking helps you when you are unsettled and not spending money (like me) or dinking...

I live in MD - it will go to Obama but... it also has little impact on the overall election results.

I think we are all on pins today!!!

Impoverished Preppy said...

I am so anxious! To think that up until McCain picked Palin I was able to regard the coming election with no stress whatsoever. I figured whether it was Obama or McCain, either would be a VAST improvement over the current administration. Then he went and picked HER and I've been growing increasingly anxious. Surely Americans can see that no matter how qualified he is, SHE is not, and he is old. God help us if she becomes VP.

TC said...

Yes! I've been calling it Y2K PTSD. I will NOT allow a single positive feeling in me to be spoken aloud; I'm positive that it was my passion--yes, mine alone--that somehow psychically destroyed The World That Should Have Been eight years ago, and I can't let it happen again.

I need strong psychoactive drugs, is what I need. Or for this to finally be over.

Angelina said...

I was just saying essentially the same thing over at my place. I am in such the same anxious state and I think I'm going to go make fresh pita bread to help me feel better.

I have never been the same since that botched election either. How do we get fixed?

Rocky Mountain Liberal said...

At least you and many of your readers can cook or bake yourselves through your anxiety. All I can do is eat chocolate in any form, which unfortunately a few days after Halloween means any cheap and grainy form it comes in. Whatever gets us through, I suppose...

gwendomama said...

ahahahah! THAT IS FUNNY! We watched that the other night. This morning I went to vote and they said, "Paper or electronic?"
After I stopped laughing (nervous fear reaction) I asked for the paper. Obviously.

The Mrs. said...

I'm scared to believe it could happen!!!!

Midge said...

I know what you mean. I was telling Guy that I would be crushed if Obama lost this election, but I don't think any election will ever have the same crushing shock that I felt with Gore.

Midnight Madras said...

Well my liberal friend, you can relax now. You will awaken to find that your hopes have not been dashed this time. Unfortunately, as Deb stated, the country only became more divided during this process, and there are 50 million or so people out there who are extremely upset. It was an electoral rout, but not a popular one. I think we are just going to see a swing to the reverse of the attitudes during the Bush years. Instead of Bush's face on all those "He's not MY president" stickers, you're going to see Obama's. I actually feel sorry for him, because expectations are so ridiculously high. How can any human being possibly live up to what he's going to have to try to do now? The criticism is going to be unduly harsh when he doesn't make miracles happen. The country will move on, but not together. And it would have been this way had McCain won too. I think partisanship is killing us and it can't be solved by either party. I just hope to God it doesn't come down to the violence that a disturbingly large number of people are predicting. I disagree with the man on just about everything, but I don't want him to die for it. I won't lie, you know I'm looking straight forward to 2012, but I hope that these 48 months in between will be smooth ones. And I'm still waiting for that pie!!!!

Belle in Bloom said...

Congratulations!

Red Flashlight said...

I'm with preppy. I'm NOT with Midnight Madras. I know a few Republicans who voted for Obama. I'm looking forward to a resurgence of centrism in this country. A resurgence of sane, rational, thinking people on the national stage. Decision-makers, not mere "deciders." Hooray for common sense!

cindy* said...

oh my...that simpson's clip really depicted the fears i had when i went to vote. i have to admit, i had the same worries as you. but, now we know and i don't think i have ever been so happy or hopeful!