Monday, August 18, 2008

My husband is not a dentist

But he plays one at our house.

Sophie has been complaining of pain from a loose tooth. This happened once before, and I took her to her pediatric dentist, who pulled it. Our dental insurance covered the extraction, but we were billed for the topical anesthetic and the bubblegum-scented laughing gas. Husband declared this entirely unreasonable and vowed to pull the next one himself. To his credit, this is his second.


Like many doctors, he feels it important to start off with a little self medication to steady his nerves.

The scotch also makes a good topical disinfectant (according to him).

He was disturbed, however, that he couldn't find the needle-nose pliers he favors for these tasks. This tool wasn't quite doing the trick.

The vice grips were just the ticket.


A little more scotch. A check to make sure he had the right tooth (this gave me concern). And one, two, three—pop!

Like I said, he's not a dentist. But Sophie is a happy patient.

15 comments:

Midge said...

I'm glad Sophie is happy but seriously that last picture is a little disturbing.

Liza said...

Um, yeah, I have to agree about that last picture being disturbing....

Broady said...

Sophie handled the actual procedure with more bravery than I did just looking at the pictures.

Hmmmm... you all bottle your own limoncello, make your own Thai food, are semi-professional campers, committed skiers, opera performers, and now you add home dentistry to the mix. Is there anything your family can't do?

Unknown said...

HA! The vise grips going toward the mouth.. I laughed my arse off when I saw that pic!! Great stuff!

Angelina said...

Max won't let anyone near his loose teeth. If I manage to touch one (he has one right now) he'll scream like a crazed torture victim. He doesn't mess with them and I ask him how come he doesn't wiggle them at all and he says he will let it come out when it's ready.

Hmmm. Zen...or fraidy cat?

Belle said...

That's fantastic! Sophie is so brave! My boys would have run away never to be heard from again if my husband came at them with vice grips. Too funny.

KSK said...

yikes! did he apply a little scotch to the pliers to sanitize them too? and, in case I ever need to conduct this procedure, what kind of scotch is he drinking there? ;)

Jen Yu said...

omg, that girl is such a sport! what interesting childhood memories, "yeah, my dad drank scotch and pulled my tooth out with some pliers while my mom took pictures!" ha h aha!

Jackie said...

This post is cracking me up!

Nice to see Husband as I've 'read' so much about him :)

Anonymous said...

I'm seriously trying to figure out if this is an early April Fool's or if it's for real. I'm guessing it's for real. Still gives me the shivers. Dear Sophie, was it as bad as it looks??!!

Cindy said...

broady: We are a pretty handy little crew! What one of us cannot do, another can. Husband cannot sing, I am not good at math, and Sophie cannot drive, but we've got those things covered (see, e.g., the p.s. below).

ksk: According to the dentist, only single malt will do.

kristen: Oh, it is very real!

p.s. Sophie reports another tooth loose. I think she's just in it for the money. Which is good because making lots of money is not something the other two of us are good at!

Maria said...

My dad did the EXACT same thing when my sister and I were Sophie's age! Instead of scotch, we had a bit of ouzo.

Now if your husband has any suggestions on what to do with teething wisdom teeth (they have been bothering me for the past few days, I feel like I need a teething ring), that would be AMAZING.

Andrew McAllister said...

Wow. That's all I can say ... wow. If I had come at my daughter's mouth with plyers in hand, the lips would have been pressed together as hard as diamonds. Sophie is a brave young lady!

Anonymous said...

Hahaha, this is brilliant. I have to say, she looks much happier than I would've been (I'd need a little more topical sterilisation)!

Zmajek said...

Ahaha, loved the story ... though when i was little and as far as i can tell, everyone was doing it this way, we put a long piece of sewing thread around the loose tooth and the other end of the thread to the door knob, then i'd walk as far away as possible and turn around and my mom would close the door, the thread would stretch and the tooth was out. ;)